The Art of Falling Apart

 

 

 

Yes, it is okay to fall apart! It’s okay to, at one point or another in life, to look around you and question every single thing that you thought you knew you had all the answers for.  We go through different phases in our lives, and we build “castles” inside of us, where we store and save everything we have learned, everything we feel, and who we are. Then, life suddenly comes up with a massive “earthquake” of unexpected changes, events, and troubles, and brings down that strong castle that you had built inside of you. Then you fall apart!

When you fall apart you can see your pieces everywhere. You see all your dreams, all the things you believed in and was sure of, all your fears, feelings, thoughts, everything on the floor.   You may feel lost, that you don’t know how to restart, or that you don’t know where and how to go on. You may think that you can’t get up and rebuild your castle again.  But guess what? YES, YOU CAN!

When you fall apart, it’s the perfect time to build your new castle.  You can pick up the pieces of you that you think are still good, and you should leave a few pieces on the floor: the ones you don’t think are part of you anymore, the ones that are not worth keeping with you (this includes everything in your life: people, habits, thoughts, feelings, relationships and others),  and you can add brand new pieces to yourself… and build a new fortress.

No one remains the same for a lifetime, and people change as they go through life. The more experiences you have in life, the more “polished” your personality becomes, so, falling apart is like getting ready to become a better version of you.

Have you noticed how the most important decisions that we have to make in life, such as which career to follow and whom we are going to marry, are made when we are not mature yet to broadly analyze all the possibilities and consequences of our choices?

Some people do fine with these choices, but others, not that much. You start building your life based on everything you believe and all the things you have learned and grew up around. That’s completely normal. Then, you choose your career, or your life partner, many times when you are still on your teens, and you are still too young to realize how serious these choices are…

Time goes by and then you suddenly become the adult that has to live and deal with the earlier choices you have made in life. You grew older and you have changed. Your personality has somewhat changed, your feelings have changed,  your dreams have changed, and many other things have changed in your life, but those choices that you made earlier, guess what? They are still there… making you unhappy sometimes, looking like strangers to you.

Then you fall apart, because it’s hard to deal with something that you thought it was the best thing for you, but now you are not that same person anymore.  And like I said before, when you fall apart, is the perfect time to pick up your pieces, and rebuild the fortress inside of you, with everything that will make you happy.  Life is short, and we should not settle for what doesn’t make us happy. Don’t put on someone else’s shoulder the responsibility of making you happy, because this responsibility is entirely yours!  You in first place are responsible for your happiness or lack of it. You are the master of your fate, and you are the captain of your soul!

Yes, falling apart is an art. Is the art of becoming a better you.  It’s like putting the right pieces on the puzzle of your life!

~ by omundodelana on October 26, 2011.